Back Against The Record Machine

This prompt was for Project Reverb on Day 11.  I’ve been off for a few days, so a free write is just what I needed.  

 

Write for five consecutive minutes on the word “jump” as it pertains to this past year.  No editing.  Set a timer.  Just write.  

 

This is it.  Make a decision.  To do or not to do.  I’ve been thinking about it.  Worrying about it.  Fleshing out the years and years and years I’ve spent forming an opinion about it.  Do it.  Do it.  Don’t do it.  What are you thinking?  Seriously?  What’s the point?  Are you certain?  Certain that this is the path that you want to be on?  How committed are you and what if and think about and if only and flash forward and failure and burning and flames.  Look at those eyes and believe, but I don’t believe and how on earth can I pull it off and who am I kidding?  And one two three jump but my feet are still planted firmly on this cliff’s edge and I saw it but it’s not real and no feelings at all and did I tell you….NO FEELINGS??  Just a dead space and no time left and what in the fucking shit is this going on inside my head?  I felt the leap but my feet are still here and the water is still below me and I could feel the dip in my stomach but my feet ARE STILL HERE, planted.  And everyone is leaving and what if they’re gone and no one sees and everyone judges and I’m not the same….but I’M THE SAME I’M THE SAME DON’T LEAVE ME think less of me cease desiring my company because I am still here and the same.  

Advertisements

One thought on “Back Against The Record Machine

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s